Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bittersweet Anniversary # 29

Today we are on our 29th LID Anniversary! Why is it Bittersweet this time in general? Well several of my travel buddies have gotten their referrals through the SN list and will soon be traveling to see their sweet babies faces. One of our sisters travels today on our LID Anniversary, and I'm truly happy for her. I know many would think I'm just Bitter in general, but I'm truly not. I am and will always be happy for my June 06' Sisters. I know by looking at their daughters faces that they truly belong to one another.
You see I have often felt just plain guilty for having my Wendy while others have never been a Mother at all. For that matter guilty for having two bio daughters on top of that.
My problem is that I am in this long wait, and that it isn't any easier since my youngest daughter Wendy continually asks me when we will be getting her baby sister. It doesn't ease when Wendy tells me all the things that she wants to play with her and that she wants to help feed and change her, and ease her fears and pain as I did hers. She truly thinks about these things... she is a BRIGHT child!!
We just keep our dreams in place and hope that very soon things will turn around and speed up. I pray that we won't be waiting on into 2010 or 2011, but be able to have our sweet and precious child by fall of 09'. It will happen and we will all be happy once it does...no, I will be OVERJOYED! Mike and I will be much older than we planned, but certainly all the more wiser.
Hey, all of those clothes may come back into style by then. The clothes we bought and received for Mylie. ha

Happy 29th to all of my remaining waiting sisters.... And to all that are waiting for their PA's I pray they speed up for you so those darlings aren't waiting too long for their mommies and daddies to come.


Lesa

8 comments:

Vivian M said...

The wait is hard, thank goodness you have your children to brighten your wait and keep you busy!
Happy 29th.

Sherry said...

The is no room for guilt on this boat. And no need for it. Seeing Wendy's little face and all the other little China babies faces gives me hope. And that's something I need to hang onto these days. It will happen for us all -- but I've given up on the idea of us all traveling to China together. But, I'm willing to give that up to for the possiblities of vacations together instead.

:)

Love you!

FHL said...

I don't think you're a bitter general at all, just honest and expressing the emotions that many have....yet are hesitant to share for fear that people will take it the wrong way. It's a tough journey....

Hugs to you!

Kristy said...

Lesa I know the wait is so hard and I know exactly how you are feeling right now. I know there has been alot going on in my family lately but as I am sitting here typing the tears are just flowing because I want my babygirl. I get scared sometimes that the rug is going to be pulled from under our feet. But I also know that God has a plan and he would not have brought us this far. We just had #31!! We both are getting there. Thank you so much for your comments on my blog, you will never know how dear you are to me.
Love and blessings, Kristy

Debz said...

Happy 29th Junebug......we will get there. I'm totally on that fall '09 boat with you.
I know I have had people think I must feel a deep sence of sadness when they tell me that they are expecting.....it's quite the opposite actually....while I wait the more babies around me the better! Like you said it will keep my mind off the long wait...I had a lady from my Church who came to me before she told anyone else that they were going threw a private adoption.....it made me feel loved that she wanted me to be the first to know and I couldn't be happier for her and her husband. That to me ...is a true friend.
Bless you Lesa
Debz

Susan said...

My dear sister, I know how you feel and will truly miss having the blessing of traveling with you. But, as Sherry said above, I look forward to family trips with all of you in the years to come. I for one will be looking into the Disney cruise as soon as we think Maiya is ready!

Things will speed up for you in the coming year, and you will have the daugher who is meant to be yours. Never lose sight of that dream and don't get discouraged.

Much love to you all, and wishing you a happy Thanksgiving holiday.

xxoo-
Susan

3peas1pod said...

Hugs to you, my sister.

Deborah

Jeanette said...

Oh, I know the waiting is so tough, especially when you have to explain it to our children. We just "celebrated" our 24th month of waiting and for my 6 year old, this "waiting" is taken up most of his young life! Praying for you and all the families who are enduring this wait!